Driving down the 405 freeway yesterday, I experienced what is most common on the streets and highways of Los Angeles: midday traffic. But I also had a new experience; one I will not soon forget.
Out the corner of my eye, I saw a large black Mercedes with a young African-American girl sitting to the far right-side of the back seat. She caught my eye because she sat slouched with her head down, almost as if she wished she could simply disappear. Black jacket hood covering most of her face, although it was not cold outside.
As I pulled up a little more, I could see why this young girl was fading quickly into the backdrop in the scene of this car. Assumedly, her parents, sat in the front seat. Dad behind the wheel while mom sat in the passenger seat yelling and waving her index finger…at her Dad.
Both took turns yelling and pointing their index fingers at each other. And every second that passed by, I watched the girl shrink more and more. I wanted to pull up on the side, roll down my window and say (in a not-so-gentle way), “Really, you can’t figure out a better way to communicate in front of this young girl?!? You are the adults here, right?” But I never slowed down.
My heart was saddened. I felt for the little girl as my lane began to outpace theirs and I continued on my journey. As I write this post a day later, I still feel for her. The tears she must cry in the dark of night when no one is around. The poor communication skills she’s learning that will undoubtedly find their way into her classroom, friendships, relationships and later in life, in the workplace and her own marriage.
We wonder how kids can be so violent. We trivialize their inability to control rage. Well, they’re learning it from somewhere and I hate to be the bearer of reality…it’s not all coming from the television screen.
Question: If you happened to be seated in the backseat of that car when this argument broke out and were given an opportunity to speak into the lives of those parents, what would you say? And how would you say it?
Until Monday…make it a great weekend!
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