Encouragement for the Childless Wife

Prior to meeting my husband there were few things I wanted more than to be a mom. My desire was to have our first child in the first couple years of marriage and then to have another a few years later. One boy followed by a girl. Several months into our marriage we went to a couples Bible study and there must have been fertilization in the water. Out of the five couples taking part in the study, three became pregnant. It saddened me. I wanted a child too.

During one of the studies, I became a bit emotional because Keith had decided we should wait at least a year before diving into parenthood. We’d discussed this in premarital counseling and I agreed with this decision 100% until everyone around us began getting pregnant. My resolve began to waver. But we stuck to our premarital decision and I’m so grateful we did.

Because we didn’t have children, we were able to travel together. We were able to spend hours, days, weeks and years learning more about each other. We know one another like the back of our hands and that has everything to do with the time we’ve had with each other pre-children.

Gleaning marital wisdom from so many successful couples in our inaugural year encouraged us to remain childless for the first 5 years of our marriage. I wrestled with this decision many times during those years, but now that I’m on the other side of it, I fully understand the need for newlyweds to spend as much time as possible getting accustomed to the various quirks and nuances about their spouse.

I’ve met women all over the world who spend so much time thinking about their future as a mother that they miss the joys of the current day. They can only focus on what they do not have – children – instead of focusing on the love that stands right before their eyes. I am a true believer that one of the worst mistakes we can make in life is worrying so much about tomorrow that we lose sight of the gift that is the present.

Yesterday was Mother’s Day and for many childless wives it was a disappointing day. If you are one of those women, or know someone who spent yesterday in a state of sadness, I want to encourage you. The best things in life comes to those who wait. But while you are waiting, enjoy every moment of every day. You will never regret not worrying about what will happen in the future but you will regret not taking the time to enjoy the moments you have today.

Invest more time in your marriage. Nurture your own body, mind and soul. Spend this time becoming a whole person; a happy person. Then the joy that overflows from within you will one day be passed on to your children. And they will be blessed. Because of you.

Until tomorrow…make it a great day!

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Fawn Weaver

Founder at Happy Wives Club

Fawn Weaver is the USA Today and New York Times bestselling author of Happy Wives Club: One Woman's Worldwide Search for the Secrets of a Great Marriage, adopting the same name as the Club she founded in 2010. The Happy Wives Club community has grown to include more than 1 million women in over 110 countries around the world. She’s an investor in real estate, tech sector and lifestyle brands. When she’s not writing or working, she's happily doting over her husband of twelve years, Keith (and sometimes manages to do all three simultaneously).