Author Archives: Fawn Weaver

About Fawn Weaver

Fawn Weaver is the USA Today and New York Times bestselling author of Happy Wives Club: One Woman's Worldwide Search for the Secrets of a Great Marriage, adopting the same name as the Club she founded in 2010. The Happy Wives Club community has grown to include more than 1 million women in over 110 countries around the world. She’s an investor in real estate, tech sector and lifestyle brands. When she’s not writing or working, she's happily doting over her husband of twelve years, Keith (and sometimes manages to do all three simultaneously).

Love Blooms In the Summer (and Winter)

Why I Love My Husband - Reason 48

Meeting Estrellita and Mario was such an honor.  Keith and I traveled on our ninth wedding anniversary from Buenos Aires (where I interviewed another couple happily married 25-plus years) to interview this beautiful couple.  North America is in the midst of its winter so it was nice to go down south (to South America, that is) and enjoy their summer.

Beyond the beautiful weather, I just love being in the presence of those happily married.  There is just something about their lives that make me want to hold on to the bliss I’ve found in my marriage no matter what.  Being around them reminds me that love is indeed possible…until the very end of time.

Similar to Silvina and Marcello (the couple I interviewed in Buenos Aires), Estrellita and Mario worked their way to the top.  She’s an ophthalmologist and he’s an orthopedic surgeon.  They began with very little (they were so poor, they’d spend weeks just scraping together enough money to go out on a movie date) and supported each other’s dreams. They never stopped believing in one other and propelled each other to the top.

When I sit among couples like these, sipping tea and eating delicious pastries from their native land, I’m reminded of the study published last year that said married couples are happier than their single counterparts over time and gave the reasons why.  Just spending time with people like Estrellita and Mario give me enough reasons to hold on to this love we have and to never let go.

Have you been looking for ways to achieve your greatest desires in life?  Trying to figure out how to reach your highest goals?  Based on the countless number of interviews I’ve conducted with successful people, here’s one definite tip: Partner with your spouse.  Two minds are better than one and four hands are more resourceful than two.  You’ll get there twice as fast and with half the headache if you’ll team up with your life partner to “git-r-done.”

At the conclusion of dinner, they surprised us with a decadent cake in honor of our wedding anniversary.  With a candle lit, they sang a song in Spanish in celebration of our special occasion.  Nothing could be better than being married to this amazing man for nearly a decade (except possibly being married to him and eating a delicious chocolate cake at the same time).  Love is certainly a thing of great splendor.

Until Monday…make it a great weekend!

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Why I Love My Husband (the never-ending list):

46. He spent hours organizing my desk that I’d allowed to become overrun with notes and random pieces of paper.

47. He calls me several times a day just to say “I love you” even though his day moves at the speed of lightning.

48. He accompanied me on a day trip to Montevideo, Uruguay last week to interview the fabulous couple in the photo above (and he never complained although it was our wedding anniversary).

49. He gives me cards for no reason and rarely writes more than one sentence in them.  But the “I love you more than life” is all I ever need to read and it makes me fall in love all over again.

50. His eyes melt my heart

51. His lips quench my thirst.

52. His caress touches my soul.

COMMENTS: With more than 83,000 Happy Wives Club members already actively engaged on our Facebook Community page, what better place to share your thoughts? Join me there and let’s continue the conversation.  

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Excited About 2013!

I’m incredibly excited about 2013.  What about you?  I brought in the New Year in South America with my wonderful hubby by my side.  He accompanied me to Buenos Aires, Argentina and Montevideo, Uruguay to interview two couples happily married for the past 25-plus year.  It was his first time joining me while I conduct interviews and I could tell he gained so much from the experience.

For one, he realized my Spanish is alot better than he knew (albeit, not nearly as good as it used to be).  And he also got a chance to be welcomed into the homes of two of these beautiful couples I’ve been interviewing from around the world.  After leaving the second interview he said, “Honey, I want to bring some of this South American hospitality home with me.”  I told him, “Babe, you ain’t seen nothin’ yet.”

There is something about happily married people.  They’re just nicer people.  I don’t mean to imply those who aren’t happily married are unkind, I’ve just noticed a commonality among all those I’ve interviewed around the globe.  They’re some of the most loving, open, hospitable, kind and welcoming people I’ve met throughout my lifetime.

I’m excited to share my experiences with you this year.  I needed to wait until I’d wrapped up my travels and visited all 12 countries before I could begin talking about similarities I noticed among the couples.  I have one final interview this weekend and Keith is hopping on a plane with me one more time (it’s so much better when he’s with me).

In Buenos Aires, I interviewed a beautiful couple.  The wife, Silvina, is one of the top plastic surgeons in the world.  Her husband, Marcello, has been a judge the past 20 years.  Two powerful people and yet they aren’t jockeying for positioning within their marriage.  I loved that.  They both began with humble beginnings (that is to say, nothing was handed to them on a silver platter).  

They attended public college (in Argentina, college -even for their equivalent of your bachelors, masters and doctorate degrees- are free to obtain through their public college system) and worked their way up the ranks.

One of the things I love most about Silvina and Marcello’s story is how they were able to achieve this great life of success by supporting each other from the very beginning.  They were high school sweethearts with dreams.  And each dug deep down inside to help the other achieve their life’s goals.  And without question, they both succeeded.

Question: Has your husband ever had a goal you helped him achieve?  And/or vice versa?

Until tomorrow…make it a great day!

Why I Love My Husband (the never-ending list):

39. He walked with me for almost 10 hours straight through the streets of Buenos Aires because I love to walk (I call it “free exercise”…he calls it ridiculous :) ).

40. When he comes home at night, he’s far more interested in learning about what great thing happened in my day than he is of sharing what happened in his own.

41. He believes in my wildest dreams and is always ready to put his on hold to ensure I achieve mine.

42. He shared with me his favorite Nepresso limited edition hazelnut coffee (even though he’s running low on them).

43. He knows me like the back of his hand and anticipates my needs.

44. Although I work from home, he doesn’t treat my job with any less importance than his own.

45. He forced me to purchase a fabulous leather jacket in Buenos Aires that I would never purchase because it looked to “fashionable” and I am a self-proclaimed plain dresser.  But he convinced me I looked “fierce” and I believed him.

Join me in creating your own Why I Love My Husband list and share it on your blog, Facebook, Twitter or Pinterest pages.  Just grab the button below and tell everyone all the reasons you love, adore and cherish your husband.

COMMENTS: With more than 82,000 Happy Wives Club members already actively engaged on our Facebook Community page, what better place to share your thoughts? Join me there and let’s continue the conversation.  

JOIN US: If you haven’t already done it, what are you waiting for?  Join the club!  It takes only a few seconds and, of course, is free.

 

See You in the New Year!

Today is my last blog post until January 3rd.  Until then, Keith and I will be travelling around South America and interviewing couples happily married 25 years or more.  These will most certainly be some of my favorite interviews so far as they will be the first one’s I conduct with Keith by my side.

When I set out earlier this summer to travel the world in search of the secrets to a happy marriage, I had no idea the amazing adventures I’d discover.  From North America to Africa, Europe to Asia, Australia to New Zealand and now on to South America, the couples I’ve interviewed continue to confirm all the secrets to a happy marriage are not based on circumstances but rather the power of choice.

What many of you don’t know (because this is the first time I’m mentioning it on the blog), is my travels were in conjunction with my new publisher and will be documented in a book releasing in the fall of 2013.  I can’t wait until I’ll finally be able to share with you the amazing lessons I learned along this journey of a lifetime.

For your friends and family who think, as Henry Youngman once said, “The secret to a happy marriage remains a secret,” there will finally be a book that shares with them the universal secrets so many of you already know.  

As this year comes to a close -and I take a few days off to celebrate my Honey’s bday (he’s a Christmas eve baby), our wedding anniversary (it’s tomorrow :) ), Christmas, the New Year and to conduct my final interviews for the book- I want to say thank you for joining me throughout this year.  

Thank you for choosing to be a light in what can sometimes be a very dark and cold world.  And thank you for choosing happiness in your marriage and giving yourself permission to express that openly.  You have no idea how many people your love will impact.  

Every time I see a couple snuggled up in a corner, holding hands walking down the street or looking into each other’s eyes across a dinner table, I think of you.  I know, at any given moment, I could be looking at one of the members of this club.  I love that about meeting you online and then believing I’ll also see many of you in person…without even knowing it.

Until next year…make every moment count!

Why I Love My Husband (the never-ending list):

26. He’s unselfish.  So much so he’s spending our wedding anniversary in Uruguay sitting by my side as I interview a couple for the book.

27. He admits when he’s wrong (and usually without my prompting).

28. And when he’s right he never throws it in my face.

29. He’s gentle in his approach with me.  He knows I’m a strong woman but still need to be handled gently.

30. He loves making love to me.

31. He’ll talk on the phone with me for hours…even though he doesn’t like talking on the phone.

32. He calls me throughout his busy work day just to check in and see how my day is going.

33. He does this thing with his eye brows -lifting them up and down in rapid succession- to let me know he’s still checking me out.

34. He pledged to be with me til’ death do us part.  And I believe him.

35. He washes dishes

36. He folds clothes.

37. He never complains.

38. He makes sure to take me out at least once a week.

Join me in creating your own Why I Love My Husband list and share it on your blog, Facebook, Twitter or Pinterest pages.  Just grab the button below and tell everyone all the reasons you love, adore and cherish your husband.

COMMENTS: With nearly 82,000 Happy Wives Club members already actively engaged on our Facebook Community page, what better place to share your thoughts? Join me there and let’s continue the conversation.  

JOIN US: If you haven’t already done it, what are you waiting for?  Join the club!  It takes only a few seconds and, of course, is free.

Shhhh…It’s a Secret

I’m sharing something with you even before I share it with my husband.  Keith’s birthday is next week so I’ve spent the past month planning a special treat for him.  And although today isn’t his actual birthday, I’m surprising him with a day full a of activities he’ll love.

Keith reads this blog from time-to-time so I need to pause momentarily for a station identification :) .  NOTE TO KEITH: Honey, if you’re reading this, please STOP HERE.  I love you and you’re just minutes away from your day of surprises beginning…so don’t ruin it!

Okay, now back to my secret plans.  I wrote that note as a precaution but it’s highly unlikely Keith will have a moment’s time to visit the blog post today.  Because in an hour (and I’m so excited about this), I am taking him to the fitness studio he goes to every morning for cycling and power yoga.  This was the only thing he asked me to make sure I include in his special day.  What he doesn’t know is it was always going to be included.  

I have 30 of his closest friends and family meeting us at the studio and EVERYONE is going to join him in his intense hour-long workout.  Can you imagine how much fun I’ve had planning this?  The entire studio is in on it, from the owner to the front desk to the teachers.  One of his teachers from his 5:30am class was scheduled to be out of town today but took a 7am flight back to make sure she was here his this surprise.

Not bad, eh?

After we all workout, we will go to his favorite nearby Mexican restaurant and toast the most amazing man I’ve ever known.  I’m capping off the day with a private dinner at one the top rated restaurants in the Los Angeles area.  Neither of us have been but often make mention when passing by it on our way through Santa Monica.

Have you ever surprised your hubby with a special birthday (day of events or extraordinary gift)?  How did it make you feel?  But more importantly, how do you think it make him feel?  Right now, I’m so excited I might actually burst!  I wish you were here to join in the fun with us.  But I trust you and your hubby will have an awesome day today, as well. 

Until Monday…make it a great weekend!

Continuing my Why I Love My Husband list:

20. He supports me in all that I do.

21. He’s my Encourager-in-Chief allowing me to dream big; never telling me something is out of my reach.

22. He bakes delicious desserts to satisfy my never-ending sweet tooth.

23. He’s faithful.

24. He doesn’t give me a hard time when I turn on Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner or Pretty Woman (two movies I’ve seen more times than I can count).

25. When we’re out and I get cold (as was the case last night), he’ll always give my his jacket.

Join me in creating your own Why I Love My Husband list and share it on your blog, Facebook, Twitter or Pinterest pages.  Just grab the button below and tell everyone all the reasons you love, adore and cherish your husband.

 

COMMENTS: With more than 81,000 Happy Wives Club members already actively engaged on our Facebook Community page, what better place to share your thoughts? Join me there and let’s continue the conversation.  

JOIN US: If you haven’t already done it, what are you waiting for?  Join the club!  It takes only a few seconds and, of course, is free.

Why I Love My Husband (the possibly never-ending list)

“1. He is EXTREMELY handsome! His dimples are beautiful, his eyes expressionistic and he is tall.  Just kidding.  He’s not tall but he is taller than me and that is all that matters.  LOL!  2. He puts up with me and my mood swings AND those of my closest girlfriends. This takes a tremendous amount of PATIENCE and understanding.  3. He is very ROMANTIC.  Picnics in the park, wine tasting, regular date nights, planning surprise trips to Europe, hot air ballooning over Napa Valley, need I say more?”

These were the first 3 items listed on Pia’s blog page when I visited on Saturday.  She’d seen my invitation here to join me in creating a Why I Love My Husband list.  And she jumped right in.  The smile widened on my face when I saw the beginnings of her list on all the reasons she loves and adores her husband.  

Speaking of lists, have you started yours yet?  If so, don’t forget to post the link to your blog, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Instagram (or whatever you’re using to showcase your list) on our Facebook community page.  And if you haven’t begun creating it, what are you waiting for?  

The amount of fun I’m having coming up with my list…I can’t even begin to explain.  I’m really serious about this, my list could possibly go on forever.  So if your list has the potential of being anywhere near as long as mine, you may want to get started on it today.

11. He loves God more than he loves me and he loves me ALOT.

12. He puts me above all people, including his mom (which is tough since he’s an only child and she’s a sweetheart).

13. He will drop everything he’s doing if I say, “Honey, want to take me on a date tonight?”

14. He’s a man of his word.  If he says he’ll do something, I can take that to the bank.

15. He lets me get in on his side of the bed at night to snuggle (before kicking me out and over to my side :) )

16. We share everything.  He doesn’t believe in “mine” and “yours.”  What’s his is mine and vice versa.

17. He spends more time than I can imagine just thinking about how to please me.

18. Making me happy is his life’s greatest joy (and if you ask him, probably one of his greatest achievements).

19. He cleans after himself.  Yes, even in the kitchen.

20. He surprises me at least once a week.  It could be something as simple as meeting me at the airport with a caramel apple from Whole Foods (as he did last week) or having a bag peanut M & M’s in the passenger side door when I get in his car.

Each one of us has flaws, idiosyncrasies and imperfections.  Just like you and I have them, so do our spouses.  Keeping a Why I Love My Husband list (aka “gratitude list”) will ensure the next time he does something incredibly silly or annoying, you’ll remember all the wonderful things he does and make a decision not to sweat the small stuff…because it’s all small stuff.

Until tomorrow…make it a great day!

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Happy Wives Club Book

 

THE NEW YORK TIMES® BEST-SELLING BOOK: It’s been described as, “Like Eat, Pray, Love but not down on marriage.” Make sure to check out the Happy Wives Club book.  I had the great honor of traveling to 12 countries on 6 continents, interviewing couples happily married 25 years or more, with 1 mission only: to find out what makes marriages happy…and keeps them that way.  It’s a marriage book like none other.  Guaranteed.

Beautiful Melody

A happy marriage is like a beautiful melody sung only by those with a heart full of love, patience, gratitude and wonderment. 

A couple weeks ago, I came across a marriage quote online that immediately grabbed my attention.  The first reason it caught my eye was my name was attached to it.  The second reason I took notice was, oddly enough, I wrote it.  

Standing in line to board an airplaine earlier this summer, I wanted to send out a quick message on our HWC Facebook community page.  I wasn’t sure what to write and only had a few seconds to decide.  What popped into my head was this:

“Marriage: Love is the reason.  Lifelong friendship is the gift.
Kindness is the cause.  Til’ death do us part is the length.”

I read it over a few times and then pressed post.  While on the plane, that quote continued to play in my head.  Like a powerful stanza from a beautiful poem, over and over those words played back to me as if my mind had chosen to remind me of this beautiful gift I’ve been given.

So when I came across these words on another person’s website recently, I instantly smiled.  Someone agreed with me.  Although I must admit I was a bit dumbfounded anyone would quote me.  I then wondered how many more may have quoted me so I did something I never do.  I Googled myself.  

Five full pages of Google results populated for this simple quote that popped into my head while boarding a plane.  In the midst of writing today’s blog post, I decided to Google the quote again just to make sure I didn’t mistake the number of page results.  I didn’t.  Only the number of pages has now increased to seven.

The reason I think this quote has struck a chord with so many is it explains some of the best parts of marriage in the simplist terms.  Its reason, gift, cause and length.  Why I love writing about marriage is probably the same reason you enjoy reading about it.  

There is just something about this mysterious relationship that can only be understood by the two people at the center of it: you and your spouse, me and my Keith.  In my life, there is still a wonderment surrounding our union and our growing friendship enlightens me daily.

Marriage is amazing.  I love everything about it.  And to have an opportunity to meet new friends, like you, who feel the same way is pretty awesome.  I may not know you but we’re cut from the same cloth.  While everyone seems hell bent on tearing marriage down, you and I are determined to build ours up and enjoy this life to the fullest.

So tell me, what do you love most about being married to your husband?

Continuing my list of all the reasons Why I Love My Husband.  If you haven’t started your list yet, grab the button below for your own blog or social networks and join me ☺.

5. He makes me laugh…every day…multiple times a day.

6. He is my best friend.

7. I can share with him my innermost feelings and I know he’ll never judge me.

8. He’ll dance with me, even if surrounded by people, no matter how uncomfortable that makes him feel (as he did last night).

9. He never made me feel bad about not being ready to have children. And now that we’re actively working on it, he encourages me and ensures I never get discouraged throughout in the process. 

10. He makes me want to buy and wear this shirt I found online that simply says, I Love My Husband.

Until tomorrow…make it a great day!

COMMENTS: With more than 81,000 Happy Wives Club members already actively engaged on our Facebook Community page, what better place to share your thoughts? Join me there and let’s continue the conversation.  

JOIN US: If haven’t already done it, what are you waiting for?  Join the club!  It takes only a few seconds and, of course, is free.

Why I Love My Husband (warning: this list may go on forever)

I was having tea yesterday morning with a new business associate when a huge light bulb turned on in my head.  I originally began this site for the sole purpose of finding other women like me; those who adore their husbands and love their life.  

Then something happened.  

The site instantly became popular, I signed a book deal (more on that another day) and then my objective seemed to shift.

Although, the purpose of this site was never to give marital advice, I began doling it out…and lots of it.  I didn’t realize I’d made that shift until Krysta and I began talking about our husbands and how much we love and adore them and my heart was filled with happiness.  

Just thinking about Keith always makes me smile from ear-to-ear.  Standing back and looking in wonderment of the life we’ve built together makes me want to skip down the street (although it’s a bit cold outside so I think I’ll stay inside and write to you instead).

But what that awesome, three-hour long conversation with Krysta also made me think about was all the reasons I love and adore my husband.

Originally, I titled this blog post, Top 10 Reasons I Love My Husband, but the moment I began writing it I thought, “There are so many reasons, how can I possibly narrow it down to just 10?”  So instead I’ve decided to begin today with the first 3-4 that pop into my head and just keep adding on from there.  I must warn you though, this could go on forever…

Beginning today until I can’t think of any more, I’m going to share at least one reason I love and adore my husband.  Why don’t you join me?  What is it about your husband that makes you smile?  What do you admire about him?  What quirk or unique aspect of his personality would drive anyone else crazy but drives you nuts (in a good way)?

As I begin running my tally, I’d love for you to join me and keep your own Why I Love My Husband list.  If you have your own blog, Facebook, Twitter or Pinterest account, copy and paste the HWC button at the bottom of this blog post to let everyone know you’re joining us in writing a list of everything that’s supercalifragilisticexpialidocious about your husband.

And for those who have never seen the movie Mary Poppins (how tragic), Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious is just a bunch of root words thrown together: super- “above”, cali- “beauty”, fragilistic- “delicate”, expiali- “to atone”, and docious- “educable.”  In other words, everything that makes your hubby rock!

And so my list begins here…

1. He loves me exactly as I am…not for who I may one day become.

2. He’s honest with me and honest with himself.

3. He has more integrity in his pinky finger than most people I meet each day.

4. He rides horses with me even though it’s one of his least favorite things to do (because it’s one of my absolute favorite things to do).

QUESTION: Will you be joining us and starting your own list?  If so, don’t forget to shout it out on our Facebook page, as well.  

Until tomorrow…make it a great day!

COMMENTS: With more than 80,000 Happy Wives Club members already actively engaged on our Facebook Community page, what better place to share your thoughts? Join me there and let’s continue the conversation.  

JOIN US: If haven’t already done it, what are you waiting for?  Join the club!  It takes only a few seconds and, of course, is free.

3 Reasons Your Marriage Should Include a Daily Ritual

 

For some reason, when I hear or see the word ritual I instinctively think of natives sitting around an outdoor fire wearing festive clothing and doing some sort of chanting or wizardry.  I have no idea where that visualization comes from; some movie I’d imagine.  But including daily rituals in your marriage is something that can immediately transform the intimacy and connection.  It’s not magic; but it can certainly feel like it.

I wonder what comes to mind when you think of rituals and if most people who hear the term are predisposed against it.  When Keith and I were first married, every time I’d attempt to take something we enjoyed doing and turn it into a ritual (or tradition as he called it) he’d protest because what we once enjoyed he feared would begin to feel obligatory.  Then one day that all changed.

Once I returned to the States, after travelling the world and interviewing couples happily married to discover the secret to a happy marriage, I shared with him one of the secrets I’d learned was the importance of creating a daily ritual in our marriage.  To my surprise, every couple I interviewed -from South Africa to New Zealand- had a daily ritual they’ve maintained for decades.  Coffee in the morning, tea in the afternoon, port and appetizers every night, etcetera.  

The happiest couples in the world (at least those I interviewed) all had this in common.  And these were the top 3 reasons every couple should include a daily ritual in their marriage:

1. Daily rituals build trust.  When you get together with your spouse each and every day and talk about what has transpired over the past 24 hours and what’s on the agenda for the following (or current) day, there is something about that communication that provides transparency.  It’s hard to keep secrets when you’re having meaningful and in depth conversations every day.

2. Daily rituals foster connectivity.  So many of us rush through life.  We talk via text message on our phones, email, Twitter, Facebook and so many other ways that don’t involve face-to-face conversations.  When you begin each morning with a cup of tea, even if you do nothing more than look into each other’s eyes and take in the day together, you are building a connection.  You are increasing your bond.

3. Daily rituals create longevity in relationships.  A New York Times article sent to me yesterday, New Love – A Short Shelf Life?, reminded me why taking the time to stay connected throughout marriage is one of the greatest investments we can make.  You don’t have to wait until the kids are out of the house to rekindle your friendship.  Stay connected throughout their childhood years and your marriage and their lives will both reap grand dividends.

Immediately following my return to the States, Keith and I signed up for a fitness class and began taking it together every morning at 5:30am.  We decided that class, followed by breakfast at home, would be our daily ritual.  After a while, the 5:30am class was tough for me to make because I stay up so late at night.  So now we take the class at different times during the day but our breakfast ritual remains the same.  And as you can imagine, we both look forward to that time each and every day.

QUESTION: Do you and your husband have daily or weekly rituals you do together (coffee every morning,  date night, playing Scrabble, etc)?

Until tomorrow…make it a great day!

Comments: With more than 80,000 Happy Wives Club members already actively engaged on our Facebook Community page, what better place to share your thoughts? Join me there and let’s continue the conversation.  

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The Problem With Marriage Cynics

It’s a fascinating thing.  When a woman falls in love with a wonderful man, we all rally around and make her excitement our own.  When she becomes engaged, we clap, we cheer, we smile and tell her she’s the luckiest girl in the world.  She holds out her ring finger and we inspect the hardware and spend hours fawning over it.

Almost immediately, the wedding plans are underway.  Bridesmaids and groomsmen are selected.  The maid of honor and best man are told of their new honors.  Wedding colors are chosen and a venue selected.  For months, sometimes even years, the ceremony and reception are planned with painstaking detail.  No stone unturned, no “t” not crossed and no “i” left undotted.  We tell the bride how lucky she is to be getting married.

Then something changes.  Almost instantly.  From the moment she says “I do,” so many around her become cynics.  They warn of all the challenges she’ll face, how difficult it will be and how much “work” marriage will require.  In what seems like the blink of an eye, the love everyone told her she was so lucky to find, is the same one she’s being warned will one day cause her pain.

And therein lies the problem with marriage cynics.  Somewhere along the road of life, their eyes have been blinded to love and their hearts jaded by hurt.  They build a woman up during her dating and engagement years just to turn around and tear her down as soon as the minister has given her groom permission to kiss the bride.  

In this (above) televised Mobbed engagement proposal seen around the world, millions watched in amazement with tears swelling in their eyes.  It pulled at heartstrings -more than 15 million of them- because most people, even in this day and time, still love a good love story.

So what causes a person to change from marriage advocate to cynic?  I wish I knew this answer.  Maybe you do.  But what I’d ask, for everyone’s sake, if you’re one of those who feel the need to “warn” a newlywed of all the challenges she may encounter along the way, please don’t.  Support her, encourage her, challenge her to be a better wife, but do not set her up for failure.  Do not plant seeds of discord.  Give her hope from the very beginning that true love still exists.

This, my friends, is the best wedding gift you can ever give a bride…and her groom.

Until tomorrow…make it a great day!

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A Happier You. Today.

How might your life change if you added in just a little more happiness?  How would the world around you change if you chose to see it through a prism of faith?  The success you’ve longed for, not only in your marriage and family, but in every aspect of your life is yours for the taking.  

This past 21 days has not been about increasing your momentary happiness.  It’s not about giving that singular emotion a bit of a boost.  My goal, and I hope it was achieved (but only you can be the judge of that), is that you would desire happiness in every aspect of your life and see the benefits of interjecting it everywhere possible.

And just in case you missed any portion of this series, the following is a quick table of contents of each of the topics from the past 3 weeks.  Browse through them or begin the series today.  You won’t regret the few minutes a day it’ll take you to read them.  I promise.

Intro: 21 Days to a Happier You

Relationship with Self

Day 1: It’s Time to Get it Together

Day 2: 5 Easy Ways to Jumpstart Your Diet

Day 3: Exercise Your Way to a New You

Day 4: Celebrate Little Victories Every Day

Day 5: Road to Happiness

Day 6: Give Yourself a Break

Day 7: Pursue Your Passion

Relationship with Others

Day 8: Building Better Relationships (For Your Own Health)

Day 9: Igniting Happiness All Around You

Day 10: Top 5 Reasons to Love the Unlovable

Day 11: Gaining the Upper Hand in the In-Law Relationship

Day 12: Become the Happiest Family on the Block

Day 13: Release Your Expectation of Perfection

Day 14: Quickly Boost the Happiness in Your Marriage

Relationship with God

Day 15: The Happiness Triangle

Day 16: Seeing the World Through a Prism of Faith

Day 17: Is Faith in God Important for Lasting Happiness?

Day 18: God + You + Your Spouse = Happy Marriage?

Day 19: It Takes More Than God to be Happy

Day 20: Receive Joy.  Choose Happiness.

Before this series, you may have seen happiness as something temporary; an emotion based upon external circumstances.  At the very least, I hope you’ve now been convinced otherwise.  Life is about choices.  And happiness is no exception.  It is a choice.  Your choice.  So why not choose it today?

Until tomorrow…make it a great day!

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Receive Joy. Choose Happiness.

Joy vs. Happiness.  I have never quite understood why anyone would want to pit happiness against joy rather than making a decision to enjoy both.  I’ve wondered this for the past couple years as I’ve had so many tell me that happiness isn’t necessary; all you need is joy.  I can’t say I agree with this but it also could be true.  But why does it matter?  

There are plenty of things I don’t need but I still enjoy.  I need spinach and other dark green veggies.  But I enjoy a delightful warm spinach salad with hard boiled eggs, red onions, and applewood smoked bacon.  I need clothes to wear and shelter over my head.  But I enjoy a comfy pair of jeans or yoga pants and an insulated residence with four walls and a heater. 

I could never understand why it was so important for people to make such a distinction.  And what was even more confusing was those usually making this distinction are the very ones who seem the least happy in their own lives.  Then one day it finally hit me.  If joy is a fruit of God’s Spirit and happiness is the fruit of our own choices, joy becomes an easy scapegoat for those who would prefer not to accept responsibility for their own happiness.

I love people.  I love seeing everyone succeed.  And even more, I love seeing everyone happy.  But so few live a life that would fall under such a category.  Why is that?  It’s something that continues to boggle my mind because happiness is the birthright of each of us.  It is an emotion that we can choose to feel at any moment of our lives.  

When my father passed away recently, all six of his children went on the stage to thank everyone for coming out and helping us send him home in grand fashion.  After our only brother spoke on the family’s behalf (poor Dad, he had 5 girls in the house), a photographer asked us to stand together and take a picture.  

A week later, my mom gave me a copy of the picture and said, “If I didn’t know better, I’d think you guys were at a party!”  She said this with a smile on her face because she knew we’d chosen happiness and received joy in the midst of it all and decided we wanted to celebrate him as he most desired.  We didn’t hide our pain.  We simply allowed our joy and happiness to override it.

If you didn’t join us yesterday, I encourage you to take a minute to read the daily blog post, It Takes More Than God to Be Happy.  And even more importantly, if you weren’t able to join us on Tuesday, you’ll want to know why Seeing the World Through a Prism of Faith is so beneficial for your life, love and health.

On this 20th day of our 21 Days to a Happier You, I want to encourage you to not get caught up in the semantics of joy vs. happiness.  Choose both.  Double your lot in life -in the best way possible.  And don’t settle for anything less than everything this life has to offer you, including happiness.  

Whether we want to admit it or not, happiness is a choice.  So for the sake of your own life, choose it this very moment and every moment hereafter.

Until tomorrow…make it a great day!

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It Takes More Than God to be Happy

I wrote the title of this post and then felt the need to quickly clarify as I knew that statement would likely elicit some protests.  But I had to write it because I’ve met so many women over the years who absolutely love God but are as definitively unhappy.  

I am a firm believer in the benefits of happiness and the power of choice.  For this reason, I couldn’t write the final week of this series -sharing the components of the happiness triangle and why a relationship with God is imperative- and not address this crucially important topic.  I use the phrase crucially important because happiness is within everyone’s reach and too many choose not to grab hold of it.

Since beginning this site nearly three years ago, I’ve had thousands upon thousands of women tell me all one needs to be happy is God.  And nearly as many have told me happiness isn’t important because all a person needs is joy.  I have now been studying happiness -what causes it and what depletes it- long enough that I feel confident in disagreeing with both of these opinions.

The debate over happiness or joy we’ll chat about tomorrow.  But for today, I want to share with you why I began this post by stating it takes more than God to be be happy.  For one thing, God did not set it up that way.  We all have choices.  We’ve all been given free will.  What we sew is what we will reap.  Our choices are not predetermined and a person’s happiness is not predestined.

One of the most fascinating statistics found in the U.S. Census report released last year was their reporting on marriage and divorce.  The majority of states with the highest instances of divorce are in the Bible Belt, an area known for their deep religious roots, social conservatism and their church attendance per capita.  

The most recent census mirrored that of the last census results released in 1999.  And although last year’s results surprised many people, it didn’t surprise me in the least.  Just as it takes more than God to be happy, it takes more than God to have a happy marriage.  It requires the right mindset; the right God-given mindset.  

Happiness is a choice.  Genuine happiness requires making a daily choice to love God, life and everything in between.  God makes your burden lighter.  He makes your challenges bearable and the tests of life understandable.  Seeing the world through a prism of faith never ceases to make life worth living.  

Gratitude naturally begets happiness.  When you wake up in the morning, grateful for the day before and thanking God in advance for what will occur in the hours ahead, you are setting your day up for success.  You are telling the world your day will be great.  This doesn’t mean everything will be perfect and all will fall in line just as you’d like, but it does mean you’ve chosen to believe all things are working together for your good and before the day ends you will have plenty more reasons to give thanks.

Happiness compliments joy.  Many believe joy negates happiness or deems it unnecessary.  They argue joy is permanent and happiness is temporary.  We’ll chat tomorrow about why this isn’t true.  But for now, I’ll leave you with this.  Happiness is only temporary if you choose it temporarily.  And it is dependent on external circumstances only if you’ve chosen to allow that dependence.  

Happiness is a choice.  Your choice.  So what will you choose?  

Until tomorrow…make it great day!

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