Today is my parent’s 40th anniversary. To be more accurate, this milestone was almost theirs until my father succumbed to his battle with prostate cancer last fall.
In Las Vegas on Memorial Day 1973, they said ‘I do’ after only four weeks of dating and never looked back. Today is a difficult day for my mom to be sure. It’s also a day when I am reminded of one important (but often ignored) truth.
There is but one thing every couple must remember if they are to live happily ever after til’ death do part:
Your spouse is not promised one breath beyond the present moment.
Remembering this point is crucial in creating a marriage in which happiness, good communication, friendship, love and encouragement trumps all else.
Have you ever gotten so upset with your spouse that you’ve gone to sleep after an argument determined to hold on to your position of being right until the next morning? You may not realize this, but in that action, you made a subconscious decision that your spouse would still be there in the morning to continue the conversation; to acknowledge you were right.
But what about those who fall asleep in that state to never have their spouse wake up again? What about the husband who walks out the door in the midst of an argument and never returns – not by his own will but that of his Maker?
Rather than spending the remainder of our lives thinking about the wonderful life we created with our spouse, we would likely live out our final days replaying that last conversation. Instead of grieving our lover, we would grieve our last words together; that bitter moment when pride took precedence over love.
Even those who are happily married, adore their spouse, and have a wonderful relationship sometimes fall into this trap of arguing over the insignificant. But what a better life those live who are reminded of this important point every moment of the day. All of a sudden, nothing is so urgent as to not warrant patience and nothing is so important as to cause a lapse in our gentle approach.
Today, in this moment, I challenge you to make a commitment to each other not to fall into that trap. Never argue over things that will not matter in the last five minutes of your life, because after all, you never know when that time will come.
When my father passed away, my mother in all her sadness was comforted by the fact that she had no regrets. She loved him to the very end and if she could do it all over again, she’d do it just the same. We should all be so wise. We should all be so in love.
Until tomorrow…make it a great day!
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