Building a Marriage That Lasts

By Fawn Weaver on Thursday, December 15, 2011

One of the things I love most about this Club is the unlimited amount of resources we have in learning how to build a marriage to last a lifetime.  We are a group of every day women, who adore our husbands, love being married, and don’t mind sharing what we’ve learned with each other.  

Every day, as I chat with hundreds of Happy Wives on our Facebook page, I am reminded of how important it is to be surrounded by likeminded people.  I always end my day inspired to love my husband better, respect him more and make my relationship a priority above all else.  I continue to learn so much from the wonderful members of this Club.

If you’ve visited this site before, I hope you’ve stumbled upon the section on the left-hand side entitled, “Quick Tips.”  This section contains bite sized “tips” from some of our members.  And if you’re a Happy Wife and have a “Quick Tip” to share, we’d love to hear it.  Just click here.

So today, rather than writing on a new topic, I thought I’d share some of this wonderful tips with you.  Here are just a few of my favorites:

“Respect.  Friendship.  Listen to him.  Give in when it doesn’t really matter but most of all…love.  These are the things that make a good marriage.  We’ve been married for 64 years and our love just gets deeper as we spend more time together.” ~ Beverly Winthers, Married 64 Years

“Wake up in the morning, and count your blessings.  Give thanks to God for the wonderful life you share with your beautiful man.  Tell him you love in, and then get up and start your day with a smile on your face and love in your heart..It’s worked for me…we’ll be outrageously happily married for 65 years in July.” ~Bette Frankel, Married 64 Years

“Listen to your husband when he talks, really listen, consider his advice, value it as good advice rather than considering it equal to others advice. Don’t be quick to discount it. Honor him in this way – you’d be amazed what you’ll learn from him, how he will feel respected and demonstrate his appreciation to you in ways that benefit you both! He longs to be respected, admired, and honored – it has made a difference in our marriage in the past 6 years since I learned this tip (married happily for 35 years and counting)!” ~ Denise Rounds, Married 35 Years

“A good sense of humor, my husband tells everyone that I married him because he makes me laugh, and that is probably true. You cannot stay angry when you are laughing! It’s true laughter is the best medicine, and of course, never ever go to bed angry. A sign over my daughters bed says “always kiss me goodnight”…and we always say I love you!” ~ J. Smith, Married 28 Years

“Laugh!  A home with laughter is a wonderful place to be.  Do not take life too seriously it is too short to not enjoy.” ~ Sharon Paige, Married 21 Years

“Always an “I Love You” and a kiss good-by, give a touch or a hug, stay connected physically and emotionally.” ~ K. Schatz, Married 18 Years

“Make it a rule to always greet your man with a kiss or a hug. If you are just going next door, to the market, or to a week-long seminar, make sure you give him some love in this manner, too. If you forget, give him a kiss or hug as soon as you remember! This has worked for us for over 17 years.” ~ June Summers, Married 17 Years

“Always focus on the positive about your husband, especially when you’re not feeling the most positive. I keep a list (used to be a physical written list, now just mental) of his best qualities – those personality traits that will not change and endear me to him. When I ever become tempted to criticize or think negatively of my man, I pull out the list and focus on those things until my negative emotions subside.” ~ Tricia Opdahl, Married 13 Years

“Contrary to popular belief, marriage is not 50/50.  It’s 100/100.  If you all give 100% you will be successful.” ~ Danielle Keys, Married 11 Years

“Make your husband #1. It is easy to get caught up in everything else in life. Your friend’s problems, you childrens issues, the dog, the bills, the state of the economy. Just remember that your man is the one who will be there for you and is not only your husband and lover and best friend but he is the one that you can always depend on. So make him #1.” ~ Patricia Donnellan, Married 10 Years

“My grandparents just celebrated their 62 anniversary. WOW right. I asked her what her secret was. She said “God, the ability to ignore and love at the same time and always forgive.” All I can say is, it has worked for them for 62 years, 5 kids, 12 grandkids, and 31 greatgrandkids. It is worth a shot.” ~ M. Rose, Married 8 Years

QUESTION: What’s the single best piece of marriage advice you’ve ever received?  Please leave a comment below and let us know.

Until tomorrow…make it a great day!

Email Signature transparent

My Twitter profileMy Facebook profileMy Google+ profileMy LinkedIn profile

Fawn Weaver

Founder at Happy Wives Club
Fawn Weaver is the USA Today® and New York Times® bestselling author of Happy Wives Club: One Woman's Worldwide Search for the Secrets of a Great Marriage, adopting the same name as the Club she founded in 2010. The Happy Wives Club community has grown to include more than 900,000 women in over 110 countries around the world. When she’s not blogging or working on her next project, she's happily doting over her husband of nearly eleven years, Keith.

 

Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are snarky, offensive, or off-topic. If in doubt, read My Comment Policy
  • Fawn Weaver

    Oh, this is easy. The single best piece of advice I've ever received on marriage is this: Choose Happiness. I wrote about this a couple months ago and if you didn't get a chance to read it, I think it's worth it (but then again, I'm biased :) ): http://www.happywivesclub.com/daily-blog-happy-wives-club/2011/11/7/the-best-marriage-advice-i-ever-got.html.

  • A. Hickman

    Bite your tongue!! He doesn't need your "suggestions" or "help" with everything even if you think you are being helpful. My husband's number one request "don't micro manage me". Respect him and how he chooses to do things even if it's not how YOU would do them. It's not the end of the world if, for example, he offers to get the kids ready and their clothes are either mismatched or wrinkled (lol). Just love on him for trying. (totally paraphrased via "The Surrendered Wife" book given to me by a very special friend…thank you Fawn!)

  • Christy Joy

    Someone once told me, pick your battles. And I love that because sometimes I get into the mindset that my viewpoint is the only one in the world or, at least, the only one that matters. So I just ask myself, is this really worth it? Moreover, when it says, "pick your battles" I have to remember that we're on the same team—that we're not contending with one another but with the actual issue instead. So in place of wearing ourselves down in disagreement with each other, we need to not take ourselves so seriously and focus on gaining resolve about the problem. That's my semi quick tip:-)

  • Fawn Weaver

    @Adriana- I LOVE The Surrendered Wife! But you knew that :) . I love that your husband tells you not to micro manage him. That's awesome because I think that comes so naturally to us as women. Kudos to you my friend. @Christy Joy- Love that you talk about picking your battles wisely and then pivot to reminding your self that you're on the same team. There's a quote by Robert Brault that I love, "There comes a time when a man and woman realize that their separate schemes can be better achieved as a conspiracy."

  • http://www.neveradulldate.com Ashley @ Never a Dull Date

    The best marriage advice I've received is to always communicate. Too often I"ll get upset with my husband and later find out that I've misinterpreted what he said and/or meant. If I only communicated with him earlier, I wouldn't have wasted time being mad at him! (That being said, my husband should learn to communicate better with me too so I stop misinterpreting what he says lol!!)

  • Fawn Weaver

    @Ashley- LOL! Isn't that what we all think, right? Too funny. Thanks for taking the time to not only stop by but to post a comment. <3

  • http://www.satisfiedbyhislove.blogspot.com Emily

    Respect him. And my advice to others is to find a way to laugh when things are hard. We have been through a lot in our short 6 years and I'm so thankful that among needles and hospital beds and vulnerable moments we can laugh with each other through all of it instead of keeling over from embarrassment!

  • Fawn Weaver

    That's great advice, Emily. We've found laughter to be such a wonderful part of our marriage. We don't take ourselves too seriously which allows us to poke fun at ourselves, our quirks and idiosyncrasies. It's truly a blessing.

  • http://thelonghaulproject.com Melissa

    The best and most helpful advice I ever received was to recognize that no marriage is perfect and every couple encounters problems. What makes a successful marriage is how you work through those problems together. I think it's common for couples to despair when they go through tough times, so it's reassuring to know this is normal. By working on issues together, you can get to the other side.

  • Fawn Weaver

    @Melissa- You've got it! An ability to work together through any challenge or obstacle is so important. Two heads are always better than one (at least, I hope :) ). Thank you so much for stopping by and taking the time to post a comment. It's greatly appreciated!

  • http://www.gottsex.com Relationship Improvement

    It has been great to read this post and the comments.. It's great to see happiness brought about in so many diverse ways. I particularly liked the idea about making your partner your highest priority. If your focus in on your partner's happiness both of you will be happy.

  • http://www.happywivesclub.com Fawn

    I agree @Relationship Improvement. Thanks for stopping by and taking the time to post a message.